Tag Archives: Suicide

Resurrection

A short story by Joybrato Dutta

Her closed eyes revealed my deceit. Her sealed lips gave testimony to my crime. Her still body made my heart pound faster, as she lay naked, beside me in a motel room. This wasn’t an act of love, nor of lust. It was vengeance, served on the rocks.

The clock struck 12:05 AM. 2013 had begun. Humans survived the scare of 2012, but humanity had ended six months ago when she dumped my best friend.

sleeping-pillsI was on my way home when I got a call from the hospital. The voice on the other end said Rohan had tried to commit suicide. He took an overdose of sleeping pills. The guy who complained about my smoking and drinking habits had figured out a way to outrun me in the race towards death.

He was in the ICU, but thankfully the doctor said he would survive. Doctors are bad storytellers. They are so engrossed in making us look at the brighter side that they don’t delve into the factors that led to the calamity. But I desperately needed answers. Just then I saw Rohan’s sister running towards me. She hugged me and wept profusely. Even before I could ask, she narrated the entire story. Shreya had dumped Rohan the night before. That’s not all, she spread the word that she did so because Rohan was a pervert and all he wanted was sex. Apparently she was a woman who didn’t believe in premarital sex. A principle I would otherwise respect, but sounds crap when stated by a woman who had the reputation of being a floozy.

And now she lay before me. Sleeping so peacefully. No trace of remorse. I wish I could wake her up and scream in her ears that perverts don’t try to commit suicide because they couldn’t sleep with one particular woman. Perverts don’t turn addicts when they get dumped. But, in a few hours she would learn the true definition of pervert and to the extent a pervert can go to get what he wants.

The effect of Roofies would last a few more hours. That foolish bitch shouldn’t have agreed to meet me. I told her I wanted to discuss Rohan’s condition. She bought it. Spiking her drink was easy. Waiting for her to wake up is the difficult part.

I walked up to a pile of dvds between which I had neatly placed a camera. Roman Polanski, a filmmaker whose movies often portrayed the immorality of a woman.   Wouldn’t he be proud of me if he knew I had used his movie’s dvd to hide the camera. Today I had fulfilled a promise I made to myself six months back. I avenged Rohan’s degradation before the end of 2012.

I loitered across the room but my gaze never left her face. Just then I chanced upon her purse. I ended 2012 by fulfilling my resolution and now I had the opportunity to discover the sacred ingredients of a woman’s purse. In the realm of beauty products I found a piece of paper neatly folded. It was her medical report. Six months back she had tested positive for AIDS.

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The ‘Alive Club’ And Its Benefits That Jiah Khan Will Miss

Ankush Kumar continues to write on why fighting the devils of the world is the only way to fight depression and how zillions others are doing it day-in and day-out. Suicide to him is the easiest escape route and unfortunately, that would not just kill depression, that will kill the self too, so how is that a victory?

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We all know how difficult it is to live up to people’s expectations. If you haven’t encountered that yet, then I bow my head to thee! For all remaining commoners like me and scores of others if you are reading this post after facing several lows in your life, after going though frustration of failures, after feeling the heat from your staunchest critics, then mate welcome to the ‘ALIVE CLUB’.

This club has its presence across the globe, the entry fees to this club are free but the cost to remain inside the coterie is extremely high. It takes tremendous amount of courage, sweat in gallons, wounds that cannot be cured with any medicine and lots of strength to counter the politics within to eventually make it to the platinum section of the club. Very few from each part of the globe are platinum members; these are the heroes we all look up to. These are the ones who smiled from one failure to another and moved up the ladder of success. They are the ones we all dream of emulating during our growing up years.

The second category of members are the Gold club ones. These are people who are successful in their own little way, but are still striving to reach the platinum section. For example Sanjay Dutt an actor from Bollywood, who has millions of fans, people aspire to have a personality like him, but the man is still going through tormenting times in his life. But the fact that he is still fighting the demons makes him a privileged member of the ‘ALIVE CLUB’. Then we have the third category the largest one in the club.

The general members, who day in and day out strive in their own respective fields, fighting different kinds of demons at home and work place to make a mark for themselves; these are the ones whose first goal is to make it to the silver club. Gold and platinum for them is still a distant dream. The journey for them is the toughest indeed; they have to fight a syndrome called depression which they encounter at a regular basis. In a world where competition is nerve wracking feeling like giving up on life is the easiest escape route. Some succumb to the pressure and hence lose the privilege of being part of the ‘ALIVE CLUB’, while the others keep the battle alive.

The counsellors around the country have been writing shorts on depression and how we should not ignore it ever since a tinsel town actor committed suicide. Nobody ignores the aspect folks; it is just that ‘we general members go through that fear of losing hope day in and day out’ and we are the best judge for ourselves on how to encounter the challenges, adjust to our new changes and move on. If the mind is suppose to be the best doctor for ourselves then depression is curable too.

What is not curable though are the invisible wounds that we commoners encounter every day. These wounds cannot be healed with any medicine. The only cure is ‘TIME’. But some people choose to defy the clock and land up doing something as stupid as committing suicide. The ironic part is that ‘suicide’ is a criminal offence in the world, but the deceased won’t even be tried in the court of law.

One court though will always ask us questions, one person will judge us on our achievements and at that time we should have the right answers. Did we do justice to the gift given to us by GOD? Did we squeeze out the last ounce of talent given to us by him? Did we survive and enjoyed the journey inside the ‘ALIVE CLUB’ or did we commit a sin and betray his faith reposed on us?

P.S: Expectations is the mother of all miseries, I am under scrutiny after my first post today. Even if I fail, I surely won’t commit suicide.

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STOP Jiah Khan! That Is Not Your Job.

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Ankush Kumar, someone who has seen the struggle of the Tinsel Town from very close quarters, having lived in match-boxed sized houses and survived on Vada-Pao, talks why no struggle, no matter how tough it is should propel one to go and take an extreme step like Suicide. A must read. 

How we wish school would have lasted till we die! The charm of sleeping in the bathroom as a hysterical mother yelled at you to get ready, the innocence of missing the school bus almost on a daily basis to squeeze in another hour of football before reaching home, fooling parents on holiday homework so that you don’t have to study, how we wish life could have been just like that.

The truth though is that none of us had imagined at school that life would be one hell of a ride. At school everything seemed so rosy and colourful; all we forgot was the thorns that we would encounter as we grew up. Today none of us know what will happen tomorrow (except the daily routine perhaps) then why take extreme steps and end the most beautiful gift GOD has given us?

Today one tinsel town actor ‘JIAH KHAN’ committed suicide; speculations are rife that she was fed up with people taunting her at not making it big in the industry. The entire social networking sites are flooded with ‘RIP’ statuses. I for one don’t feel like putting up one though. Why on earth should we care for other people’s opinions? We were not born in to this world to please others! I am sure the people who lamented at her failures, had not gone far themselves. Because the people who have achieved stardom know that it takes time to reach the top, and they are so immersed in work that they have no time for such cheap talks.

Every time a tinsel town actor is caught taking drugs, or committing suicide, the world starts questioning the working ethics of the industry? This is highlighted by the media because it generates eyeballs, it gives them money from advertisers, and it gives them TRP’s. There several working professionals from other sphere too who end their lives, are involved in brawls, but we hardly come to know about such activities. Why question the darker side behind the glitz every time a weak individual takes an extreme step? Why don’t we talk about the smaller fringe players who put in hours of hard work, day in and day out to create that glitz for us viewers?

We unfortunately have become a society that thrives on stories of failures. Rumours will fly for quite some time now. Media channels will run her story, blame the industry, and expose the bitter realities of the ‘Gore behind the Glitz’. In some dingy area of suburban Mumbai, where strugglers reside, they will feel a little sad, will give their struggle a second thought, some may question her morals and character, there will be gossip mongers who will create stupid stories of sex, sleaze and lies and torment her soul forever. But I still don’t feel sorry for her, because she chose to do the job of GOD.

The Bollywood film industry lives by one mantra ‘THE SHOW MUST GO ON’! That is exactly what will happen, people who have work will continue to put in the efforts, strugglers will continue to work for that elusive break, and losers will continue to have suicidal symptoms.

Some will make it to the national headlines like ‘JIAH KHAN’ because she had managed to crack some big films; others will be lost in anonymity forever.

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