Tag Archives: Sexuality


By Joybrato Dutta


Do you know why people prefer porn that has stories in it? We don’t just want to watch two people having sex. We want to know the build-up. A slight hint of courtship can make it more relatable. And then of course the foreplay. Which by the way is more arousing than the actual sex (I mean watching). In other words we all enjoy watching other people having sex. We would love to peep through windows. No wonder MMS clips are such a huge hit. We all are voyeurs.

When I was 9 years old I witnessed such a moment without even peeping through a window. It has been enshrined in me in such a way that today after 17 years I sit to write about it.

My apartment in Jamshedpur was located at quite a height. Anyone standing on the terrace would get quite a good view of the city. However, other people can hardly see what’s happening on the terrace making it a safe house. Precisely why my friends and I often performed Planchet there. Also, every social gathering pertaining to the residents of the apartment always happened there.

The biggest event on the terrace happened to be the New Year’s party. So 17 years back on the 30th of December we were sitting in Mr. Ghosh’s house finalising the plans for 31st night. My friends and I were trying to be useful. Those days we were treated as servants by the middle-aged women.

They used to command us like:

Beta zara kursi le aana                                                                                                                            

Beta dekhna zara nal chal raha hai ki nahin                                                                                            

Beta dekhna darwaaze par kaun hai

And we proudly performed the tasks. Some future ass-lickers even tried to make sure they performed all the tasks before others, just to impress the aunties.

So we were all sitting there waiting for instructions, when suddenly Mukherjee aunty said “Chalo abb chat ka muaayna karte hain, wahin chal ke decide karte hai ki dance floor kahan banega aur Housie kahan khelenge”

So the future of then’s tomorrow hurried up the stairs to the terrace. While the aunties followed us. Rahul and I were the first ones to reach the terrace. We ran towards the corner guarded by the water tank. And then ……..I saw it.

The most gorgeous body was lying naked on the cemented porch. Along with the most hideously hairy ass.

Numerous logical questions occurred in my mind

What are they doing?                                                                                                                                  

Why are they naked?                                                                                                                                  

Why are certain parts of the body the way they are?                                                                        


I was too young to know the process of sex, even the significance, probably even the meaning of the word. Bollywood closed the doors, or switched off the lights or showed waves dashing against the shores, even a cork popping out of a champagne bottle. I hardly understood the metaphors.

But what I was seeing was heavenly. The most beautiful woman in the world was lying in front of me. Naked. Blood-flow found a new passage. A road it had never travelled on before. I felt weird. I felt the urge of doing something, but just didn’t know what. All I knew was that life had unravelled its deepest secret.

Amidst that moment of revelation the super-idiotic friend of mine shouted out “Mummy dekho yahan kya chal raha hai”. They hurriedly wore their clothes. Surprisingly the hideously hairy ass guy decided to wear his shirt first.

Just then the gang of aunties arrived. What followed was a deafening series of howling, shouting, swearing et.al. One aunty came and chased us out of the terrace. In fact she locked us in her house so that we can’t watch the show any longer.

We ran to our balcony to get one last view of the girl. She was beautiful. She had the most amazing body any woman can have. Her eyes were……….I don’t exactly remember her eyes. She wore a red t-shirt. I was praying to God for one last eye contact. And then for a fraction of a second she looked at me. One last look. Probably she was abusing me, probably she found me cute. I will never know. She left with the guy.

I tried looking for her, but I was too young to look harder. She will never escape my mind. She is the reason I like women wearing red. She taught me so much about life. She ignited a flame in me. A flame no one can extinguish. She turned me into a voyeur at the age of 9. And each time I watch porn I know that deep inside me, the 9 year old still lives.

  • Porn and I (missionsharingknowledge.wordpress.com)

The Dark Enlightenment – I

By Joybrato Dutta


Chapter 1 – The Scared Princess

She cursed her fate each time the traffic lights turned green. She prayed hard. One wish – Prolong this journey. For once, she desired to bypass her destination. But to her misfortune, her taxi raced by every other counterpart and in a flash she reached the dreadful hotel.

“Purity is a myth. Even the Gods didn’t posses it.  And when someone like the Hindu Goddess Sita possessed purity, she was put to a test. Because no one believed that she could be pure. Not even the Lord, Shri Ram. So it must have been we humans, who created this myth to vindicate our selfish beliefs”, Nikki said to herself trying to overcome her inner conflict.

As she stepped into the hotel, her eyes met several eyes. Some had suspicion, some had curiosity, some encouraged, some impeded and some misguided. Her eyes finally chanced upon the elevator. Her hands were shivering as her index finger pressed the button ’9′. The inside of the elevator was covered with mirrors. She looked into it, but couldn’t stare at her image for long. Shame and profanity made her hate her own reflection.

She reached the 9th floor even before she could start praying. The elevator doors opened and she stepped into the aisle.

A grey carpet, a grey aisle, grey walls with grey frames with grey pictures all guided her to a grey door. Room number 903. She opened her clutch and took out the keys. Her hands shivered as she tried to unlock the door. CLICK.!!!The door opened.

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Chapter 2 – The Stealthy Weapon  

The room had candles lit all around. As she entered, the fragrance of Jasmine allured her nostrils. She loved Jasmine. And yet she was stopping herself from succumbing to its lurid odour. “Make yourself comfortable, I’ll be out in five minutes”, a male voice screamed from the bathroom. After many years her horrifying past had resurfaced. A past she had concealed, even from her husband.

Three years back, on a rainy night she made sweet love to a complete stranger. It was the last day of her MBA. She was stoned and elevated to an echelon where making love seemed to be the epitome of purity. Little did she know back then, that her felony was being taped.

But today she had to make love, once more to that guy, just to undo her past. She feared that the horror might not end today and would resurface invariably. Which is why, she carried a knife. She quietly hid it beneath the pillow. And then she waited for him to come out of the bathroom. And while she was waiting, she got undressed and wore a robe kept on the couch.

Her heart skipped a beat. The bathroom door opened.