Tag Archives: Facebook

The Great Indian (Before) Marriage Tamasha – Part 4

By  Shwetha Kalyanasundaram

arranged-marriage-597x400

The last blog post (in this series) ended with the following question “So what happens if the horoscope matches?!?” Read on…

If the horoscopes match at both ends, one moves onto a phase where you try to get to know each other!! This is done to see if they are compatible with each other. Well, in most cases, the two people involved are always going to be at their best behaviour, giving stereotypical answers, in an attempt to impress the other person.

Questions are asked on a variety of topics and hypothetical situations are drawn and one is gauged on the answers given and the level of compatibility is measured based on these answers!! Practically speaking, people tend to behave in a completely different manner, when faced with the actual situation. And one’s thought process is going to change as you mature and one is going to act according to the situation at that point of time. Given this, how will you know you are choosing the right person as your life partner?!?

Pondering over this question, I finally drew my own conclusion and here it is: (mind you, the next few portions can be serious!)

There’s always the pending fear and anxiety of things going wrong. The person you are trying to match needn’t necessarily portray their true nature. The whole act might be pre-mediated in an effort to create impression. Even assuming that the true nature is always portrayed, human character is still amenable to change with growing years.
It’s hard to judge a person based on a finite set of questions however hypothetical it may be.

I would like to draw a similarity with that of a job interview. If 3 people were being interviewed for one position and all of them seemed technically strong with good credentials, then it’s a tough call right? In that situation I would go for the one with that extra zeal, motivation and rapport. (Psst…Behavioural reasoning would help me weed through this.)

You make a choice based on your essential needs and requirements which absolutely cannot be compromised – your core values. How do you gauge that this person isn’t pretending to possess those? You observe how they behave in their surroundings and with their surroundings. You follow their journey to the current destination which should usually serve as a predictor to where things will proceed. But remember that there will always be forces beyond your control that can cause disruptions and distress.

That would explain why horoscopes are so heavily relied on. By placing your faith and fate on an astrologer you are essentially alleviating the anxiety levels and creating self-assurance on a secure future. Hell, I have seen things go wrong even with horoscope match.  Remember, humans are innately good. It’s how each person reacts to different circumstances that define their character.

Hence proof that I m a thorough Human Resources professional! *chuckle*

After years of the groom hunt, I finally found my man. And yes, I did have my share of “flashing bulbs” and “ringing bells” moments that I believe are supposed to happen when you come across your soul mate. And a definite proof that it takes just over two and half minutes to decide your soul mate!! (A recent research quotes this!)

I now truly believe in destiny!

And as every fairy tale ends, we live happily ever after!!!

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The Great Indian (Before) Marriage Tamasha – Part 2

By Shwetha Kalyanasundaram

arranged-marriage-597x400

So how did my search for Mr Right go?

With everyone relying upon technology (to throw you solutions), my parents, just like millions of other Indian parents, put my profile on every matrimonial site available. My parents and I sat down (with a notepad and a pen) to list out our expectations and to draw up a profile for me that could be posted on these sites. After sessions of brain storming and cluttering our house with crushed balls of paper, we finally zeroed in on what had to be put up on the web!!

Oh, these also involved consultations with astrologers to prepare a list of birth stars that would match with mine. Phew, it was one hell of a task before my profile finally came up in the various marriage portals.

I should also mention the confusion we had over the kind of photographs that had to be uploaded on my profile. Should we choose a photo with a desi look or could the photo show the modern moi?!? For those who still don’t understand the reason behind this confusion, here’s a brief explanation. Guys (waiting to get married) want girls to have a modern outlook towards life (this is one statement that’s so common and visible in all the guys profiles) and would not want to see a photo of a girl in a sari; they call such girls “pazhams” (Tamil slang). And parents do not wish to see the girl in sleeveless dresses or in jeans and they term such girls “liberated”. To put an end to all this bokwaas (made popular with the release of Chennai Express), we put up 6 photos in all, in different costumes, catering to all “their” needs. Now that’s a lot of choice we have given the parents! And with the advent of social networks, the changes to your Facebook profile photos to suit the needs of the groom and his parents – one helluva job!

This blog would make no sense if I do not talk about the tamashaa involving horoscope matching!! If astrology is all about maths and physics, why do astrologers differ?!?

And then the calls started flowing, multitudes of them. Details, telephone numbers, email ids and horoscopes were exchanged. The homepage on our PC and laptops changed to the matrimonial portal. From our end, numerous profiles were scanned, a handful shortlisted from them and horoscopes downloaded. My mother then ran to our family astrologer for matching purposes, and always used to return crestfallen, with just two to three horoscopes matching. This had become a routine, and our astrologer’s number had been assigned as “the priority” on the speed dial list on our mobile phones!

It is a known fact that no two astrologers have the same opinion. And that results in total chaos!! If the horoscopes match at the girl’s end, it doesn’t on the guy’s end and vice versa. When only a handful of horoscopes match from a billion others, my mother reached a state where she stopped believing in astrology. She didn’t want to involve a third person (the astrologer, that is) to decide the future of her child (that’s me!!), rather she decided to believe in destiny!

So is there more fun to this?!? Wait and watch!!!

MS Technology Management : Decoded

By Ankit Chandra

Man and Blue Ones and Zeros

It might be a late night with no action in Las Vegas that has prompted me to write this, but, I wanted to put this up for many reasons..

1) Frustration
2) Information
3) Education
4) Entertainment

Like our Marketing professor taught us, I am trying to segment, and then target different audiences of this blog: prospective students for MS Tech Program, bored internet blog visitors, and fellow people looking for jobs 🙂

So first the history: I was working rather well at naukri.com (India’s biggest jobsite), when my boss kinda motivated me to quit my job. Alongside, I was very enamored by the product team at naukri, for it seemed they had the best of both the worlds. There was also a person called Sujith Nair. He was a dynamic project manager at naukri, who was someone I usually looked up to. But being the Taurean that I am, I didn’t wanna take that much time (which was anyhow short) to get to where Sujith Nair was. Simultaneously, there were these new chaps recruited from ISB into naukri at seemingly ridiculous salaries… (grrr) and above all, I wanted a change!!!

So came into picture Technology Management.  My research on the internet for Technology Management (on  edulix.com, etc ) showed me a bunch of options, including MBA in Technology Management at Berkeley, MIT, EPFL Lausanne, and MS – Technology Management at UIUC (with one year course duration). I liked MS Tech at UIUC because the College of Business was ranked at 38 in the world (financial times), the program was at UIUC (a campus which has GREAT reputation), and this was a quick one year program (so I could get to earning money sooner). At that time ISB wasn’t ranked in the global rankings (now in 2012 it’s somewhere around 11 in the world), and IIMs were somewhere in the 100s… (plus I flunked CAT more than once 🙂 )

I applied, kinda after the deadline, and made it in. I was very ecstatic about it!  And then the program started… The fact that MS Technology Management was a one year program made it a very intensive course work. And before we had even unpacked our bags, we ran into our first and most critical Fall career job fair. I did my part of selling, and got interviews from many great companies like Yahoo, Microsoft, Facebook (which I couldn’t attend, and it turns out to be a VERY expensive mistake 🙂 ), Expedia, Cashnet USA, Capital IQ, ZS Associates etc, and got great feedback from all of them. It seemed they were very interested in the Technology Management program and what it had to offer…But there were 3 things which stood out after this:

1) They weren’t sure about what this Technology Management program was all about, and consequently there was a confusion about what profile they wanted me for.Some even asked me ‘So where do we place you’!. So some companies interviewed me for a software engineer position and some did for pure marketing… a major mismatch.

2) I wasn’t prepared enough with the MBA (which is what Technology Management is wrapped around) training to handle the interviews as yet. After all, it was just 4 weeks since we had come in, and were thrown in to compete with the one year MBAs… I was given a case interview when I didn’t even know what that was…

3) I wasn’t prepared even for the interviews where I thought I had a good chance. It takes at least 6 months ( in my opinion) to crack interviews at top companies, and I had only 1-2 months of clueless preparation effort. What I learned from this was that you MUST find out the ‘what to dos’, and ‘how to dos’ of interview preparation. Use career services, including engineering and business, your contacts and alumni to find that out.

As the program progressed into Spring semester, the whole course started to make sense. It is a great program in terms of what it teaches us… The bigger picture of technology and its management became clearer. I could now see the business value in the code I wrote, which till now I evaluated only on how smart it was and what cool things it could do… The holistic picture of Technology from Innovation, Supply chain, Process Management or financial perspective (like how should we value a dotcom) started appear clearly.

But sadly, there were more things happening in the ‘happening’ world, and the problem was multi-pronged:

1) some greedy people borrowed too much money and built houses with it, and caused the sub-prime crisis. (why does it always rain on me!!)
2) The fall semester job fair was gone and spring was mostly for internships (which we don’t have scope for, unless one goes out of the way and extends the program)
3) The career services department seemed as clueless about this program as the companies were :p

so ‘long story short’ as a speaker in marketing class said, we have to search for companies, educate the companies about the MS Technology management program, fight the recession (by praying to God) and keep looking for jobs everywhere… The final thing I realized was that this is NOT an easy job.

But with all that said, we went to HP Labs for a visit and made a presentation about commercializing a technology they had developed. They were really impressed with the multidimensional analysis of the technology we presented. So I think we are on the right track… what we need is a lil bit of hard (harder) work, and a lil bit of luck…

For all the people who want to come in to technology management stream, ( from anywhere in the world) please make sure that you have a good amount (around 5 years) of technical experience, so that u have the technology in ur head before coming here to see how to manage it. It also depends on what u wanna be after you graduate from the program (don’t join this program to ‘enter’ the management line). Also ensure that you understand what you want from the program, coz this is NOT a regular MBA and if you want to get into finance, accounting, marketing etc, this is NOT the program for you. this is simple and pure general management with a ‘technology’ focus (especially at MS Technology management- UIUC). So ur expertise will still be the technology u came from. Next, use UIUC’s brand image and network. Make sure u make great contacts in fall semester, coz I m not sure how many would land great jobs then. Use these contacts later when u r ready to take the technology management interviews. Job hunting is mostly going to be a year long exercise, and u must start as soon as u get here. You will get better with time, but start making those contacts as soon as possible.

Good luck. (pray the recession gets over soon)

PS: I did land a job by the end of the may 🙂 I joined this company after my OPT was processed, rather dramatically (But that needs a blog post of its own 🙂 )

Ishaq da Dhaaba – Day 1

By Joybrato Dutta

how-to-live-life

Note – Had written a play long back. This is the edited version of it. 

Zindagi jhand hai phir bhi ghamand hai, charo aur ladkiya hai phir bhi haatho mein …….. Sheher mein rehta to ghamand ko kayi baar thes pahunchta. Yehi soch kar mai wapas apne gaon Chamiyatown chala aaya. Socha koi dhanda shuru kar lunga. Sheher ne do cheezey sikhayi thi –  ghodo par betting aur doosro ki setting. Betting ke paise abb setting se doogna karne ke vichar se mai gaon mein ek pyaar ka consultant ban gaya.

Abb gaon mein TVC, radio spot, print ad, poster, dangler, loha lasoon prakaar ki advertising to hoti nahin. To main bhopu lekar shuru ho gaya

Deviyo aur sajjano

Suniye suniye aur sunte jaiyye

Intezar ki ghadi hui khatam

Mohabbat ki kaksha mein abb aap aayenge pratham

Ameer ho ya gareeb

Hamesha hoga koi na koi kareeb

So kholiye dil ka darwaza

Kyunki aa gaya Ishaq da dhaaba

By the way this has nothing to do with Ramdev Baba

Iske saath hi maine bajaya gaon ka most romantic gaana “Khulla hai mera pinjra aa meri maina, chura na aise ankhiyaan ladne de naina, Haaaaaaaaaaan”

Pehle grahak ne kadam rakkha. Yeh the Humraaz gang ke leader Abbas Gwaala.

Abbas – aur hero dhanda kaise chal raha hai

Me – Bas bhaai dua hai aapki

Abbas –  Bhaai se dua hi lega ki kuch dega bhi

Me – hukum kijiye bhaai

Abbas Bhaai mere table par padey kuch ex and y Miss Chamiyatown ke photos dekhne lagey.

Abbas – yeh laundiya jawan lagti hai, kitne ki hai

Me – ji pachhis ki

Abbas – sau ya hazar

Me – ji matlab

Abbas – abbey pachhis sau ki ya pachhis hazar ki

Me – ji yeh pachhis saal ki hai

“Abbey rate bata”

Me(clearing my throat) – Bhaai mai date set karta hun rate nahin

Abbas – abbey kamaal karta hai. Naam hai dhaaba aur jab khaane ka daam poocha to mana karta hai

Me – ji aapko galat faimi hui, mai yahan ladkiyo ke saath setting karwaata hun. Aggar aapko kisi se pyaar hai to mai aapki setting karwa sakta hun.

Abbas (disappointed) – Abbey pyaar to humko har doosre din hota hai. Aur setting ka kya hai ladki ke ghar 2000 bhej deta hun. Maani to theek, nahin to uthwa leta hun.

Me (in a very phati huyi condition) – Bhaai aap rockstar ho. Par kar kisi ke paas aap aapke jitney suvidhayein uplabdh  nahin. To unki madad karne ke liye maine yeh dukaan khola hai.

Abbas bhaai left with dejection. Pehla grahak disappointed. Bad omen. But himmat nahin haari maine.

Doosra grahak tha gaon sabse coolest playboy. Naam tha Abhi Dey

Aate hi bole Abhi dey

Me – Kya dun?

Abhi – Abbey naam hai mera Abhi Dey

Me – Maaf karna par kaafi raub jama kar bheekh maangte ho aap

Abhi – yo man. English talk to me. Hindi is below aukaat.

Me – Ok. So do you like anyone?

Abhi – Girl name Rita, sister name Sita, mother name Sangeeta, and babuji sells pheeta. Aur usi ne my heart jeeta

Me (after cracking the riddle) – Babuji ne?

Abhi – Ritaaaaaaaaaaaa Rita  you fool

Me – So do you love her?

Abhi – No no no. Her body big. Backside bigger. I want the girl. Ma babuji want bachha. Total mamla sex mein nipta.

Me – Sorry but I don’t deal in sex. I will help you only if you are in love.

Abhi – Don’t panga with me. I see gory filmein all day and I watch 60′s ka porn. Mera setting karwa else I’ll tell everyone that you sell such cheap stuff.

Yeh keh ke Abhi Dey ne humaari le li aur nikal liye.

Sar phat chukka tha aur pichwada chipak chukka tha. Itne mein ek bewde ne kadam rakha. Andar aaye aur bade pyaar se apne tashreef ko kursi par rakh diya.

Me – Ji mai kaise aapki seva kar sakta hun

Bewda – ek chicken tandoori, ek kaleji fry aur paanch naan. Aur thande mein kya hai?

Me – Abbey mere ko dhaabe ka waiter samjha hai kya?

Bewde – Abbey maal maara hai kya. Baahar itne bade board mein Dhaaba likha hai.

Me – ji yeh Ishaq ka dhaaba hai

Bewda – Ishaq? Veg hai ya non-veg

Kisi tarah apne gusse ko shaant karke maine uss bewde ko baahar nikaala. Thaka hara mai wapas apni kursi par baitha ki woh balkhaate huye aa gayi. Chamiyatown ka official speaker Miss Bhookhi Sawant.

Bhookhi – Ji mai Bhooki

Me – Kamaal karti hai aap, itno ko khaa chuki hai aap, phir bhi….…

Bhookhi – Ji mai Jejus par bahut trust karti hun. Jejus ne hamesha mera saath diya. Jesus har dukh mein mere saath rehte hai. Jejus nahin hotey to main nahin hoti. Kal raat Jejus mere sapne mein aaye, boley aapki dukan mein mujhe Jejus jaisa ladka milega. To mai  Jejus jaisa ladka dhundne aayi hun.

Me – ji yeh to thoda tough hai

Bhookhi – dekjhiye aagar aap meri help nahin karenge to Jejus bahut naraaz honge.

Me (dharam sankat mein) – dekhiye waise to ek ladka hai. Aaj ke yug mein wahi Jejus hai.

Bhookhi – kya naam hai?

Me – TRP

Bhookhi – ji?

Me – Aaj ke date mein TRP hi Jejus hai, wahi decide karta hai kaun jeeta kaun haara, kaun hit hai kaun flop hai. Aapke liye TRP hi sabse apt hoga. Main jald hi aapki setting karwaata hun.

Bhookhi Sawant khush ho gayi apni cleavage ki ek jhalak dikhakar chali gayi.W0h dekh kar mere dil mein dhande ko aage badhane ka jazba utpann huwa.

Aa gaye agle grahak. Pyaar mein harey huye ek bhookhe sher. Naam tha inka Sheikh Baval.

Me – to Baval ji, kya karte hai aap

Baval – Ji mai photographer hun

Me – waah lajawab. To kahiye aapko kissey pyaar hai

Baval – Apne chitro se

Baval Ji ne kuch dus ladkiyo ki tasveero ko mere saamne rakh diya.

Me – Ji aapka collection to mere se bhi zyaada hai. Do chaar tasveere mai bhi rakh sakta hun kya?

Baval – haath mat lagaana mere tasveero ko. Mai yeh tasveere sirf apne paas rakhta hun. Na kisi ko deta hun, na Facebook par upload karta hun.

Me – Magar aapko inme se pyaar kissey hai?

Baval – Jo mere se sabse pehle pategi, mujhe usi se pyaar hai. Waise inme se paanch ki shaadi ho chuki hai, aur baaki paanch ki honey waali hai.

Me (dumbfounded) – Ji yeh to kaafi kathin aur beimaani waala kaam hai.

Baval – Agar tumne mera yeh kaam kiya to mai tumhaare tasveero ko itna raunchy bana dunga ki agle 5 janmo tak tumhe apne facebook ki profile pic change karne ki zaroorat nahin padhegi.

Abb aise deal se kaun inkaar kare. Baval ji jhush huye aur nikal liye.

Shaam ho gayi thi. Dukaan bandh karne ka waqt ho gaya tha. Mai bas nikalne ki taiyyari kar hi raha tha ki, aa gaye ek aur grahak. Naam tha inka Toy Toota.

Toy – Ji hum Toy hai

Me – To kahiye Toy Ji kisne aapko chaabi ki

Toy – Ek Punjaaban ne. Naam hai Darupikar Hawan

Me – Waah kya madhosh naam hai. Koi tasveer hai aapke paas

Toy – Ji mere blog pe hai. Aapke yahan net connection hai?

Me – Ji hai. Link bataiye

Toy – bakchodi.slogspot.com

Me – waah kya naam hai

Toy – achha jab aapne blog khola hi hai to mere do chaar posts padh ke phatafat comment kijiye na

Me – ji zaroor padhunga, pehle aap apni kahani to bataiyye

Toy – arey main kahan bhaaga jaa raha hun. Padhiye comment kijiye phir baat karte hai

Cut to 4 posts par comment karne ke baad

Me (pareshan ho kar) – Toy ji abb to bataiyye. Koi tasveer hai aapke paas

Toy Ji ne tasveer nikaal ke saamne rakh di

Me – Toy Ji daru ki nahin Darupikar ki tasveer dikhaiye

Finally Toy Ji ne apne album mein kaafi ladkiyo ki tasveero mein se ek tasveer nikal ke diya.

Allah kasam ladki to Allah taala ki nayamat lag rahi thi. Shakal soorat aur size se lagg raha tha ki kaafi raes ghar ki ladki hogi. Toy Ji jaise jaise uske bare bolne lage, humara charitra waise waise phisalta gaya.

Kahani ke anth tak humey Darupikar se pyaar ho gaya. Phir humara imaan jaag utha. Humey laga ki yeh dukaan humne doosro ki bhalai ke liye kholi hai. Lekin phir humne socha ki agar dhande mein munafa na ho to dhande ka fayda kya. To humne Toy Ji ko bhatkaana shuru kiya.

Me – Toy ji, bura mat maniye par humko laundiya theek nahin lagi

Toy – kaisi baatey kar rahe ho, ladki to achhi hai. Hrisht-pusht bhi hai

Me – Kahan Toy Ji? Ladki kitni peeti hai, peene ke baad kitni ulti karti hogi. Abb aap to samjhenge, kal ko gharwaalo par ulti kar di to, phir mohalle waalo par. Aisi ladki ke saath……..

Toy – bakwas kar rahein hai aap. Uske bare bura mat kahiye. Woh meri maal hai.

Me – Toy Ji, zara apne hunar ko pehchaniye. Aap itne jaane mane blogwriter hai, aapke dil mein hi nahin album mein bhi ladkiyo ki bheed hai. Aap chahe to kya kuch nahin kar sakte. Arey aap jis par ungli rakhenge wahi pategi. In fact aapke liye mere nazar mein ek bahut hi khoobsoorat ladki hai.

Tasveer dekhte hi Toy Ji ke totey udd gaye. Hawaon ne rukh moda. Pyaar ki raah se digress hokar Toy Ji abb Hawas ki raah par chal pade.

Toy – yehi yehi chahiye mujhe. Aap bhagwaan ho. Item ki dukaan ho, nahane ka saaman ho. Mujhe isi ladki ke saath setting karni hai.

Toy Ji ko maine kiya setting ka vaada. Toy Ji khush hokar chale gaye. Humne bhi apni dukaaan ki shutter down kari. Dil khush tha, kyunki mujhe iss dhande ki taakt samajh aa chuki thi.

Mujhe yakeen tha

Gaon mein Ishaq da dhaaba aisi aag lagayegi

Ki Hawas ke pujariyo ki band bajj jaayegi

Dhaaba closed for the day!!!

Friends Are Our First Major Decision In Life

group of friends

By Ankush Kumar

Last Sunday I sorted my closet, this is a routine whenever my ballooned waist decides for a change. During the entire exercise a few pieces of clothes took me back to some very fond memories.

I had this old torn white shirt of my school days. It was our last day at school before our board exams. There were best wishes messages, colors and torn ends that reminded me of the madness that took place that afternoon. I had pretty much lost touch with that bunch of pals but Facebook revived those memories.

While cleaning the lower rack of my tees section I came across a red shirt (still baffles how did I buy that one). A few friends and I had gone shopping for our first day at college. Thanks to my waist, which always embarrasses me, we tried a million stores before I finally found this shirt. My friends annoyed by stupidity, convinced me that it was looking awesome on me. I eventually was ragged to death for my red little riding hood. To date they are my closest friends and, they haven’t missed a single chance in making my misery public.

While I was arranging my photo albums neatly inside my closet, I stumbled on a few photographs. One that took me back in time was when my friends and I had beer and cigarette for the first time. One of my friend’s dad had this huge collection of scotch and cigarettes and he used to keep it in a drawer inside his bedroom. We were bored to death watching the same movie again and again, purely out of fun, we sneaked in while he was out and stole a packet of cigarettes and booze. Then went near a beach and tasted blood for the first time. Then we were just having fun; today those photographs have become cherished memories.

Once I was done with my closet act, and was dumping all my old belongings in the trashcan, a thought struck me. All material gifts get worn out and replaced, parents are a relation we choose by blood, but its friends we make independently. It’s the first major decision we take, some turn out to be sour and some very sweet.

Happy Friendship’s Day.

नशा ही नशा है

change society blog

शीला चित्रवंशि कि कलम से

कहीं यह शीर्षक “नशा ही नशा है “देख कर आप सब चौंक तो नहीं गए? क्योंकि मैं ये सब नशे में नहीं लिख रही हूँ। वरन सही मायने मैं आप सभी का ध्यान इस बदलते हुए समाज के अन्दर जो निरंतर नयी नयी कुरीतियाँ फैलती जा रही हैं, उनकी ओर आकर्षित करना चाह रही हूँ। आज समाज में दिन-ब-दिन जो बदलाव आते जा रहे हैं उससे आप सभी अनभिज्ञ नहीं। यानि की सामाजिक ढांचा ही बदल चुका है। जिसका सीधा-सादा प्रभाव एवं परिवारों पर कहीं कम तो कहीं ज्यादा नज़र आता है, जिसे अनदेखा नहीं किया जा सकता है।

सवाल यह नहीं है कि लोग अनभिज्ञ है या फिर भिज्ञ; सवाल तो यह है की हमारी भारतीय संस्कृति पाश्चात्य सभ्यता से कहाँ तक प्रभावित है और क्यों? समय-समय पर बदलाव तो हमारे समाज में सदियों से चले आ रहे हैं – यह कोई नयी बात भी नहीं है। फिर समाज हो या परिवार, सब उससे प्रभावित भी हुए हैं। पर इतना भी नहीं कि अपनी ही संस्कृति या उसकी सभ्यता तथा अपने ही नैतिक मूल्यों को समाप्ति की कगार पर लाकर खड़ा कर दिया हो। ध्यान दें तो परिवर्तन न केवल सृष्टि का नियम है वरन समय की माँग भी है। समझने वाली बात यह है की हमारे भारतीय समाज में फैली हुई वे कुरीतियाँ जिनका सीधा-सादा प्रभाव हमारी भारतीय सभ्यता एवं  संस्कृति पर पड़ा , क्या वह पश्चिमी सभ्यता का अन्धानुकरण नहीं?

यहाँ पर हमारा उद्देश्य किसी भी देश की संस्कृति या फिर उसकी सभ्यता पे टीका-टिपण्णी अथवा कटाक्ष या व्यंग्य करना नहीं । हर देश की अपनी अलग अलग संस्कृति एवं सभ्यता होती है जो वहां के वातावरण, पर्यावरण, उनके अपने आचार-विचार एवं वहां की सामाजिक स्थिति पर निर्भर करती है। अब उसके लिए ये आवश्यक नहीं कि हम विदेशी संस्कृति की अपनाकर ही आधुनिक या फिर उच्च व्यक्तित्व वाले कहलायेंगे। हम अपनी संस्कृति में रह कर भी एक प्रभावशाली व्यक्तित्व बन सकते हैं । देखा जाये तो हमारे अपने ही देश में विभिन्न प्रकार की संस्कृतियाँ देखने को मिलती हैं। उदहारण स्वरुप मराठी, गुजराती, राजस्थानी, पंजाबी आदि आदि। पर हर एक संस्कृति की अलग-अलग सभ्यता देखने को मिलती है। उनके खान-पान, रहन-सहन, पहनना-ओढना , नृत्य कला, संगीत एवं भाषाएँ तक अलग अलग हैं । गर्व की बात यह भी है कि विभिन्नता में भी अभिन्नता देखने को मिलती है। सबकी अपनी अलग अलग पहचान है। जहां तक मेरा अनुभव है किसी देश की संस्कृति अच्छी या बुरी नहीं होती। यह पूरी तरह हम पर और हमारे समाज पर निर्भर करता है कि हम क्या अपनायें और क्या ना अपनायें ।

वर्त्तमान सामाजिक बदलाव को देखकर तो ऐसा ही लगने लगा है जैसे न ही अपनी संस्कृति रह गयी है और न ही कोई सभ्यता शेष है। जहाँ तक सवाल उठता है पाश्चात्य सभ्यता का तो हम लोगो ने उनकी संस्कृति की अच्छाइयों को नज़रंदाज़ करके उनकी उस सभ्यता को अपनाया है हमारी भारतीय संस्कृति के प्रतिकूल है। जिस भारतीय समाज में हम रहते हैं , वहां का वातावरण, सभ्यता एवं मर्यादाएं तथा उनके नैतिक मूल्य कुछ और हैं। ऐसे में जब हम उनके पहनावे में अपने आपको ढालते हैं तो उनकी खुली सोच और उनके खुलेपन का अन्धानुकरण कर बैठते हैं, जो हमारे वातावरण में नग्नता सी दिखती है। आजकल हमारे समाज में मानो आधुनिकता की परिभाषा ही बदल गयी है, जो जितना कम से कम पहन कर अधिक से अधिक शारीरिक प्रदर्शन करे, उसे ही आधुनिक समझते हैं। उसे ही हमारे समाज में “modernity ” का नाम दिया जाता है।

इतना ही नहीं, समाज में फैले हुए विभिन्न प्रकार के नशे का प्रभाव भी कम नहीं है। आज खुलेआम  drugs का सेवन करते हुए अधिकतर स्कूल के लड़के लड़कियां इधर-उधर घूमते नज़र आते हैं । साथ ही युवा वर्ग भी पीछे नहीं हैं। जगह जगह पर pubs देर रात तक dance floor में केवल लड़के लड़कियां ही नहीं अपितु युवक-युवतियां  भी पश्चिमी धुनों पर डांस करते, थिरकते , smoke करते  नजर आते हैं । इधर बड़े शहरों में आजकल एक प्रचलन और चला है “Hukka Bar” का, पर उन हुक्कों में तम्बाकू के स्थान पर drugs हुआ करता है । ऐसे वातावरण में अश्लील व्यंग्यों की भी कोई कमी नहीं होती जिसका परिणाम भी स्पष्ट रूप से झलक रहा है । आये दिन छोटी बच्चियों से बलात्कार, छोटे छोटे स्कूल में पढ़ते नाबालिग बच्चों का ज़रा-ज़रा सी बात पर झगड़ा, गाली- गलौज, धमकाना, डराना, एक दूसरे की जान तक ले लेना – ऐसी बातों से समाचार-पत्र भरे पड़े मिलते हैं ।

आजकल समाज में जो कुछ भी चल रहा है क्या इसकी ज़िम्मेदारी हमारी युवा पीढ़ी के साथ साथ हमारे media पर नहीं जाती? आज सभी वर्गों में अधिकतर लोगों के पास दूरदर्शन एवं कंप्यूटर की सुविधा होती है। इस कारण बच्चे बाहर कम अन्दर दूरदर्शन एवं कंप्यूटर पर अधिकतर बैठे दिखाई देते हैं । ऐसे में जाने-अनजाने, सही-गलत का अनुभव न होने के कारण बच्चे जब दूरदर्शन एवं कंप्यूटर देखते हैं, तो उनके मानस-पटल पर जो छवि बैठ जाती  है वे वही करने की कोशिश करते हैं, और प्रायः कर बैठते हैं, जिसका प्रभाव स्पष्ट नज़र आता है।

ऐसी स्थिति में हमारी युवा पीढ़ी आज की आने वाली पीढ़ी से थोड़ा-बहुत भी संतुलन बना कर चले तो सामंजस्य मुश्किल नहीं । आज का वातावरण देख कर तो ऐसा लगने लगा है जैसे हमारी भारतीय संस्कृति विदेशी संस्कृति से इतना प्रभावित हो चुका है कि अपने ही नैतिक मूल्यों को खोकर पाश्चात्य सभ्यता की ओढ़नी से अपनी  ही सभ्यता और संस्कारों को ढकते चले जा रहे हैं । सोचना यह है कि युवा-पीढ़ी इस बदलाव के इन झोंकों के साथ बहकर इतनी दूर न चले जाए कि अपनी ही धरोहर को – जो भारतीयता के नाम से जानी जाती है – खो बैठे, और उनके अपने ही पास अपने बच्चों को देने के लिए कुछ शेष न रह जाये।

अभी कुछ वर्ष पूर्व तक हमारे समाज में एक शब्द “मर्यादा” का भी हुआ करता था, पर आजकल के वातावरण में इस शब्द की कोई मर्यादा नहीं रह गयी है । कभी-कभार कहीं कहीं आते जाते कानों में पड़ जाता है की मर्यादा में रहना सीखो । आज वर्तमान पीढ़ी को आप कुछ भी कहें तो आवाज़ एक ही आती है, वो भी चारो तरफ से “पता नहीं आप लोग किस ज़माने की बातें कर रहे हैं। दुनिया इतनी बदल चुकी है की लोग चाँद पर पहुँच गए पर आप लोग रहेंगे वाही लकीर के फ़कीर।” आजकल स्थिति एकदम फर्क हो चुकी है। इस पीढ़ी को यह समझना चाहिए कि चाँद पर पहुँचाना एक अलग बात है । हम आज अपने संस्कारों को खोये बिना ही वह सब कुछ कर सकते हैं जो हम चाहते हैं । ऐसा लगता है जैसे परिवार और समाज के पारस्परिक संबधों का ह्रास  होता जा रहा है, जिसके कारण सामजिक तनाव बढ़ता जा रहा है । समाज में फैली कुव्यवस्था का एक मुख्य कारण यह भी है ।

मेरा लिखने का आशय ये कदापि नहीं कि मैं आप लोगों को कोई उपदेश या नसीहत दे रही हूँ, वरन समाज में फैली हुई इन कुरीतियों पर ध्यान दिलाना चाहती हूँ जिन पर आपका दृष्टिकोण जाता ही नहीं, क्यूँकि आप स्वयं ही उससे प्रेरित हो चुके हैं । पीढ़ियों का अंतर तो स्वाभाविक है पर अगर हम और आप चाहें तो पीढ़ियों के बीच एक मद्य संतुलन बना कर भावी पीढ़ी के भविष्य को सुरक्षित रख सकते हैं ।

 

 

Being SoBo! South Bombai’ite

south bombay

By Ankush Kumar

It was the monsoons of 2007 when two of my friends arrived in Mumbai for the first time. They checked into a hotel and took a taxi to come and meet me. The first question the driver asked them was ‘Sahab Bombay jaana hai’? It caught my friends a little off guard. Yes dear readers! If you do not live between Cuffe parade and Worli you ain’t a Soboiite. Someone who has lived in South Bombay takes immense pride in boasting its residential status.

If you are a SoBoiite you enjoy certain perks and benefits and are always considered a cut above the rest. Here are a few key ingredients that make you an original inhabitant of the island city.

1) If the citizen addresses the city as Bombay and not Mumbai, chances are you are talking to a SoBoiite. For them Mumbai starts at World Trade Center Cuffe Parade and ends at Worli Seaface. The rest for them is foreign invasion.

2) Majority of the shoppers in the city head to Phoenix arcade or their neighborhood malls for shopping, but unless you aint seen at the Taj or Trident shopping arcade or at the Colaba causeway (depending on budget) you aint a Soboiite.

3) You walk into a pub all decked up for the evening and are looked down upon in disdain for your over the top clothes and make up, lady you have just met the original SoBo gals. They believe more in minimalistic decking up and yet look very appealing.

4) You are discussing which Hindi movies is going to release the coming weekend and how hyped the Khan wars is right now, and someone slips in a comment that ‘the last movie he/she saw way Sholay and that also on Dvd’ understand he is true bloodied SoBoiite.

5) If you are ignored when told that you have studied in a CBSE school you know you have encountered a SoBoiite. For them Campion, Cathedral, JB Petit, St. Mary’s are acceptable schools rest are just big mistakes.

6) A suburban citizen is always excited to go to South Bombay, but tell a SoBoiite to go to the suburbs and they would need atleast a week’s notice and a promise not to get tagged in the Check-ins on Facebook.

7) Last but not the least a true South Bombai’ite will never call himself/herself a SoBoiite, the suburbs gave them this name. They don’t look down at people not from South Bombay, its just that they are not from South Bombay: -P