Category Archives: Fathers Day

Chronicles Of A Mom – To – Be!! Woo Ho!! Part 5

pregnancy

 

By Shwetha Kalyanasundaram

A new day dawns bright and it’s the first day of my second trimester. First thought – One down, two to go!!!

Over the course of the next 4 weeks, it’s amazing to watch your little peanut grow from the size of your clenched fist to the size of an orange to the length of your palm. Wow really?!? Great delights do come in small packages!

As the little one prepares for a great debut appearance (in a couple of months, that is) and life outside your womb, it’s always interesting to hear and read what the baby is doing inside you (a li’l too early to feel the baby jig as it wiggles its newly formed toes and fingers). Towards the end of this month, Mother Nature teaches the baby to suck its little fingers. Hold on baby orange – it’s mittens for your hands when you’re out!

And finally the BUMP appears. You can no longer pass it off as a stomach after a heavy lunch!

To add to this, the woes of my mother who can’t get her forty winks, thanks to the nocturnal nasal symphony (performed by me, of course! In simple English, it’s snoring). She says it reminds her of an induction motor running. Boy, that can be really disturbing.

Not that I’m a weight watcher; but to see the numbers creep up every time you stand on the scales can be depressing. Sigh, one has to pile up the pounds to support the baby inside you. In my case, according to my BMI, it’s close to 25 pounds. Goodness gracious me! But Vidya Balan – I love you! Thanks to you and definitely Dirty Picture, curvy is in! I’m definitely embracing my new-found curves!!! A high protein diet with the necessary carbs, and not to forget, the goodness from buckets of ice creams – yummy! What’s going on?!? Blame it on pregnancy cravings!

As your wardrobe makes way for new clothes (read: maternity clothes), it’s scary, at first to imagine your cupboard to be filled with ghastly tent-like muumuus to hide your expectant shape. The dread is replaced by excitement when you visit a maternity shop. Today, maternity clothes are very fashionable and practical to wear. I love it!

Though the little one is far from ready to make a personal appearance, it’s really nice to know for sure there’s actually someone in there.

Until next time, goodbye folks!

 

Disclaimer: As much as the above experiences are my own, I have definitely referred to my pregnancy bible “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” by Heidi Murkoff and other pregnancy blogs easily available on Google for certain details and reasoning.

 

 

 

Chronicles Of A Mom – To – Be!! Woo Ho – PART 1

pregnancy

By Shwetha Kalyanasundaram

Two educational degrees – check! Career – check! Marriage – Check! Love – Check! Baby – Err?!?

A couple of months into our blissful marriage, a delayed period turned our lives into a tizzy! Barf! The numerous visits to the bathroom to retch, occasional dizziness, a freaked out husband!

Could I be pregnant?!?

The neurotics that we both are, we both spent a couple of sleepless nights googling out the numerous signs hoping that they could just be false alarms. There was no way that I could be pregnant. A baby was definitely not in our bucket list of things to do in our first year of marriage (sigh).

And soon enough, the first appointment with the gynecologist – the doc who delivered my husband! After a few milliliters of blood less and an empty bladder and two hours of waiting, the big P – moment finally arrived! We had done it!  I was PREGNANT!!!

An ecstatic mom and dad – in – law and overjoyed parents and a hurried call to my husband to regroup back in the house, my fingers were crossed! How do I break the news to him?!? Numerous flashes of the Cadbury’s ad showcasing the wife breaking the news of her pregnancy kept playing in my mind. Do I follow a similar technique?

The husband arrives…with a bunch of flowers and a box of my favorite chocolates! What?!? Am I dreaming?!? A warm hug and a kiss on the forehead later, and with a wide grin on his face, “Can you believe it baby? We’re gonna be PARENTS soon!!”

Let the celebrations begin!

What happens next, stay tuned!

Silent Support – My Father!!

i love you daddy

By Dwaipayan Chakraborty,

Happy Father’s Day.

Never wondered about going up to my father to wish him a “Father’s Day” as it would seem a very formal gesture. But this is also true I never told him how big a support he has been throughout. Through this piece I would like to take the opportunity to tell him and everyone how significant he is in my life.

As like most families, my father was the sole breadwinner, until he retired from his services. But if I look back at the days of my childhood, the earliest memories between us would mean that I was dead scared of him. Rarely did I speak loudly when he was around, never did I ask for any extra favour. The reason of such a scare was his strict behaviour & rigid attitude. Any mischief never went unpardoned. The discipline ranged from a slap to a heavy beating in order to drill the right thing in my head. Gradually this fear created a distance between me and my father. In his presence, I could never be myself, kept silent most of the time. My mother was a friend, and my father often, a stranger.

There were a lot of things I wanted to tell him, share with him, take his opinion, but that uncalled for distance never let me do it. From school to college and on to a professional field, the distance persisted. At a later stage he probably understood my uneasiness and often openly asked, but every time I ignored it saying everything was just fine. He was a good student, and I being a moderately ordinary his share of disappointments with me was evident. Yet somehow I have nudged my way through all of these and become the sole breadwinner for my family. It does give me a sense of pride to take over the mantle from him.

It is this retirement period of his where I understood what actually he meant to me. However unbelievable it might seem but it’s true that standing toady I can speak my mind to him without any fear. The person twenty years ago and the person now are a lot different. He has become a lot more patient, surprisingly an ardent listener too. Sometimes I wonder what if this had happened earlier, my attitude, his life; our family’s future could have been a lot different. Even after all such minor complains, I have no regrets at all.

As I now work in a professional field, I understand how the office hours take a toll on the mind and body. Now I understand why he used to get irritated when mother used to ask me to take me to the field after returning home. Now I understand how difficult it is getting frequent leaves for family commitments. The fact that he was a strict disciplinarian has shaped me into a cultured individual. At that time restrictions seemed cruel, but now it seems those are required in order to lead a healthy and sound life. He knew my mother was soft on me, often pardoning my mistakes, so he was very strict, balancing it prudently. Agreed he sometimes went overboard, but all that now seems acceptable. I remember he toiled hard, rarely taking holidays and trying to accumulate as much as he could, all for our comfort. From school books to cricket bats, though he never bought me myself, but asked my mother to give me everything I required. I regretted that as a family we hardly had vacations, but today we have a moderately spacious house in a metropolitan city, which does require savings over a long period of time.

A transition from a boy to man, has made me realise what a father means to a family & to his children. Now while I am finishing this piece, I wonder how comfortable my life has been, mostly because of a silent support existing from behind the curtains in the drama of life.

By virtue of my father, I feel content today. His relationship with me might not be too loud with expressions, but an undercurrent act of endless support.

However formal it might sound but each child should once go up to his father, hug him and acknowledge his presence after pausing to think, what life would have been if this grumpy old man was not around.

Thank you Baba.

Father…Thy Name is Pillar

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Gurulakshmi Iyer-Hait writes about the two fathers he sees in her life. One her own and the other her husband and the father of her kid. Another great read this Father’s week. 

A father is neither an anchor to hold us back,

Nor a sail to take us there,

But a guiding light whose love shows us the way.

–       Anonymous

I see my husband excited when I teach my son to wish him on the Father’s Day. An excitement and shine in his eyes that has been elusive before. I can see his feelings of pride of being a DAD!! An evolutionary offshoot and the line that distinguishes him from manhood to fatherhood!!

After I had a kid, I often compared my husband with my dad. Both of them are so different from each other yet so similar. Though I was never very close to my dad and we kind of disagreed on each and every issue, I remember my dad had always counted on my decisions for him. I was always street smart for him and he never vouched my words. As a very protective dad, we were bound by many restrictions.

On the other hand my husband as a dad is very carefree when it comes to adventuring or experimenting. He has always encouraged my kid to do whatever he wants. This big ounce of a personality defines everything.

We sisters were never scared of dad’s scolding and it was real fun to fool him too. I had so many friends who were so scared of their dads and listening such telltales really surprised me. The same is the situation with my kid. He loves fooling around and pranking on his dad.

For those who felt fathers are emotional, I have two emotional dads in my house. One is my dad and the other my husband, both of them extra emotional when it comes to their kids.

However over the years I grew up, I always felt that if a family has a pillar of support that has to be dad. Our father was always a great strength to both of us. And I am very sure that my kid will also bank on his dad while he grows up for his support, financially or otherwise.

While I see two opposite fathers in my house, opposite in personalities, opposite in approach yet the love and care that they shower upon their kids is the same.

No matter Dads are always special!!

You Have Been A Friend, Philosopher & Guide, Thanks Dad

father day

It takes a toll to manage a son like me and he has done it with perfection. It always helps if your daddy becomes your best buddy and he certainly turned one. Here’s for him with the caveat that not just one day but even 365 in a year is less to celebrate a papa like him. You certainly are the best. 

I was one of those troubled boy kid who was more scared of her mom than anything on the planet. My mom is one stickler for perfection and let me be frank, I was not even close to one. I would say I am still a work-in-progress but in those days I was worse. It was my dad then who would spring out of nowhere to save me from my mom’s wrath when I would not do my homework, not be up-to-date with my class write-ups or do anything wrong. If he could not manage saving me because sometimes it could get tough he would wear his slippers and move out of home because he for one could not see me cry. That is my earliest memory of my dad’s saving me qualities.

Things went ahead and I grew up only to become more naughty outside home. Hitting the ball out of the park and breaking glasses became a habit and so did people turning up to my home asking for a blanket ban on me playing cricket anywhere near their houses. He would though pay up all the time saying “he would play, what he breaks you can repair, take money but he would play”.

I don’t remember ever asking my mom for extra money because I knew she would decline thinking I would misuse. My father always tended the currency to me irrespective of the purpose. I remember asking him for Rs. 5000 during my last week of MBA because I was dating the most beautiful girl I had ever seen (this was what I had said to him) and he sent Rs 10000.

Things came to such an extent that I started discussing things which ideally no boy my age used to discuss with their fathers. My friends and I would go for a smoking joint (I still do not smoke or drink) and my father would know where I am. This was trouble for everyone else because my father would also know who smokes and drinks and who does not.

He never curbed my natural instincts, not even when I said I want to go out of home to prove myself. I am a single son and I know how important it is for him to see me. Till then it was like a routine for him to see me daily and suddenly I dropped a bomb. He though as usual allowed me the experiment and here I am struggling to make a mark even after 5-years of being away from him. He probably knew this and also the fact that someday I would be back with him, to share food from his plate and to take a bite of snack from his hand.

It was not that we never disagreed. The greedy person that I am, we never agreed with his way of business, where ethics and morality always stood ahead than any amount of money. His peers went way ahead of him in terms of money and social respect (which these days is proportionate to the size of the wallet) and he kept talking of good and bad karma. It was only when these great man as I always thought of them because of their come-what-may make money attitude fell, and took with them their entire families, did I realise what my father always meant when he quoted Warren Buffet vis-a-vis my example of Mr. Dhirubhai Ambani.

Today as I am on the verge of turning on the wrong side of the 20’s I sometimes feel could I be a tenth as good as he is? Naah, I don’t think so. I am just not confident I could because the two biggest qualities of his, sacrifice and patience, are things I lack totally.

I could write a book on our relationship but would rather sum it up with this beautiful poem from Louisa Mansfield

DAD,
When i was born,
You were there to catch me when i fall, whenever and wherever.
When i said my first words,
You were there for me,
to teach me the whole dictionary if need be.
When i took my first steps,
You were there to encourage me on.
When i had my first day at school,
you were there to give me advice and help me with my homework.
I still havent finished school,
or walked down the aisle, or had my first child.
But i know you will be there for me through all these times and more, the good and bad.
So i just wrote this to say ‘I LOVE YOU DAD!!!’

Thank You Dad! For Everything

dad

Anshuman Sharvesh continues Father’s Day celebrations by thanking his dad for everything he has done for him. He rewinds his life a bit to figure out three occasions when his father made a heroic dash for him. 

Person: Beta, whom do you love the most, mom or dad?

Child: Mom (without any hesitation)

Person: and why?

Child: Bcoz she love me the most, dad is strict.

It reminded me of myself and my childhood days as all the answers he gave were just replica of mine or can say of every guy his age. But if someone fires this question in a slightly different manner, like who has sacrificed the most for you, I will say my dad, with all due respect to mama.

The strictness, disciplined life and even the slaps that I used to receive have made me a better person. Today, when we here at Mission Sharing Knowledge, celebrate the entire week as Father’s Week its a pleasure to share a few short stories/incidences that have taught me lessons of life.

Police at my house:

It was a bright sunny day and as all children my age do, I was playing cricket after the school hours. Because of a mishap, I got involved in a brawl and another guy, older than me slapped me, just like the Harbhajan-Sreesanth incident. Unlike Sreesanth though, I retaliated, picked up a stone and threw it on him. He was left bleeding with blood oozing out of his mouth. He reported that to his father who in-turn came to my house with the police. Seeing the mob dad asked me to narrate the whole story which I did. He politely asked me to join my mom in the room and handled the situation all by himself. I still remember the loud slap that evening but I also remember the fact that after the slap I have never used violence to feed my anger.

The day I failed in my 10th Pre-Board Examination:

The result day, a dreadful one and more frightful if you have failed in two of the papers. I got my result and went straight back home. I told my mom everything and although she was furious but seeing me disappointed, she consoled me. Then the real thing began as we waited for Dad to return because it was his signatures that was needed for the result sheet to be handed over back. He came in late that day and after having dinner I gathered all my courage and gave him the mark sheet. After having a detailed analysis he said one thing that was quite touching and inspirational and that was ”beta bus 70 aur lana hai 3 mahine hai, hojayega” .

My break up:

Yeah I know what you guys must have been thinking. What a guy I am? But these things were in my closet for a while now and telling you all this is only making me more comfortable about my past.

As the girl in my life bid me goodbye, I was left devastated. It was the end of the world, 2012 (which came and passed without a shock had actually happened for me way before the calendars touched the date). Like SRK of Kal Ho Na Ho, I cornered myself away from everyone. Dad came to me and said a single thing to me and that was “aaisa hota hai,normal baat hai sabke sath hota hai….bete now you are a grown up boy”. No really, I know this was unusual but this is what verbatim happened.

That hard slap, the unusual encouragement and the weirdest consolation that you have ever heard helped me to be a better man.

I thank you dad for everything….love u the most and if given a chance will change things you did not like of me…I love my dad the most!!!!!

तेरा रिश्ता बड़ा कमाल पिता

fathers-day-canada

Satish Tehlan is back with a bang and this time with a wonderful poem continuing our Father’s Day week long celebrations. Awesome read as always. 

ऊँगली पकड़ कर तू ही संभाले,
सिखाता पहली चाल पिता।

कभी घोड़ा बन-कभी कंधे ले,
तूने सहलाए मेरे बाल पिता।

तेरी प्यार भरी इक चुम्बन से,
है खिल जाते मेरे गाल पिता।

मुझे मम्मी अच्छी लगती,
पर देता है सब माल पिता।

तेरी मेहनत, तेरे पसीने से,
मेरे घर की ईंटे लाल पिता।

हर संकट स्वयं झेलता,
है गोवेर्धन सी ढाल पिता।

केवल तेरे ही दम से है,
मेरा घर रहता खुशहाल पिता।

मेरे घर आँगन की बगिया के,
तुम ही हो तरुवर-छाल पिता।

मेरी हिम्मत-शौहरत तुमसे है,
तेरे बिन जीवन बेहाल पिता।

मै कायल हूँ तेरे जज्बे का,
तेरा रिश्ता बड़ा कमाल पिता।

Working Dad walking with son